I know I haven't posted a lot lately. It's because I've been struggling to figure things out. I've been doing a lot of reading and trying to improve myself. I've been so negative lately and I want to put that behind me and be a more positive person. I have a feeling that it's not going to be an instant transformation but I'm working on it.

My dad sent me a copy of Napolean Hill's book "Think and Grow Rich." It's a good book. At first I thought my dad wanted me to learn to accumulate money, but as I read it, I'm realizing that "growing rich" is about much more than accumulating money. I know that my dad wants my life to be rich in that it's a good and full life.

I let Nicole talk me into doing the dance competition this summer. She and JD are trying to work it out so that I get paired up with him. JD is the best male dancer. He knows how to teach and how to bring out the best in his students so I really, really, really hope I'll be paired with him. It's a few months away. I probably won't know until June.

I haven't seen or spoken with Jason but I've decided not to be mad anymore. It's probably doing me more harm than it's doing him. I wish him well, but that doesn't mean I want him in my life. He has so much baggage with Kelly and he needs to work that out for himself.